Monday, June 20, 2011

Crossroads or Crosshairs?

Most of you are aware that I am/have been working as a freelance writer for the past few months and while things having been going well, and I have made some contacts and gotten more exposure, the finances are not quiet balancing up yet.  Which I've tried not to worry about.  Till about 2 weeks ago.

My business partner whose entire mantra was "I hate working for the man, I'm gonna work for myself" called me soooooo excited and announced that she had gotten a full time job----working for someone else.  Ok????  How am I supposed to feel about this?  On one hand, "Yea for you!  Go chase that paycheck playing by someone's rules.  I hope you bring in the big bucks."  On the other hand, "Way to go, thanks for honoring the commitment we made to this business partnership!"

So after I freaked out and got depressed for several days, I rallied, came up with a new game plan, and pressed on.  One of the things I did was apply for a small business loan to have some working capital, but b/c my debt (a lot) to income (not enough) ratio is too high I got turned down.  Not much of a huge shock there.

But now I found out that benefits for Jeremiah just got cut by $350 to $16.  Go figure.  Nothing has changed, except the month.  (I hate being a govt sponge right now, but I'm doing all I can to remedy it.)  The woman on the phone who I spoke with/cried to said she didn't understand the rules, but that's the way it was. 

If things don't change by the end of August, I'll probably have to move, but I'm not sure where to go.  My parents don't have the room, so I'll probably have to pull Jeremiah from the private school a church member has offered to pay for and move down to Tampa with my grandmother. 

I'm really upset right now, and could use all the prayers that you can spare.  I am certain that my calling is to be a writer, but I'm really needing God and some serious money to come through for me.

This certainly makes interesting fodder for the rest of my life story.  Maybe I'll be the next JK Rowling minus the retarded wizardry.  Sorry JK, never could get into that shit.

But at least I have this to make me laugh!